why

why are you doing this?

because it keeps me alive

what do you do for a living?

something else.

Movement

. I still wish it was you besides my bed instead of him. I still post  my pictures publicly in hopes that you see them. I still  yearn for your touch. I still miss the color of my cheeks only you could bring out I still  sigh would I be this person? if you had…

what they don’t know

They ask me to hear the world to fear the world tik tok  tik tok it’s supposed to be a reminder ‘not much of you is left’ I ask them to leave me alone. They tell me not much of me is right I  really do not care I fancy creating shapes in shadows I…

Goat Story

She was going to be a unicorn or nothing else,and she did not understand nothing or else so she was definitely going to be a unicorn.

Chapter *19 * Alan Rickman,Isis and Oli’s lameness

I hated Snape all the time..his hair style,his grim look,the way he talked to Harry….but oh my god J.K Rowling wrote the most twisted love story of all times thanks to you….when I found out Snape loved Lilly after all this time god knows how many kleenexes I had to use…..Snape thanks for making me believe in true love.

An article for you

Well this is awkward. I write when I am bleh and it seems I am bleh most of the times….but you know when I reach the height of ‘blehness’? When you ask me to clean my room. Like yes I am aware of the fact that when other people see my room they might be…

2016 :To be and not to be

To be : 1.Useful 2.Kinder 3. a love song that makes people  want to dance 4.be the person minie thought I was.❤ (Rest in peace …I miss you ) 5.be the rainbow that I have always been 6.in love with life. 7.more of a listener. 8.more serious about words. 9.someone who has the ability to…

HAPPY BIRTH MONTH :)

To the man brings out my true colors. HAPPY BIRTH MONTH🙂 I could not be more grateful for your life,my most favourite life alive.Thankyou for always being there regardless of the weather and season. Thank you so god damn much for being awed by my yellow,hot pink,blood red and smokey grey days. You have been…

CHAPTER 18: Bidhya Bhandari,Books and Bitches

I am supposed to just chill and appreciate the fact that a woman is the president of a country where only stone goddesses are regarded as powerful and flesh goddesses are considered impure for they menstruate

POTS AND PANS

They said pots and pans were all that could define my potential little did they know their words were prisons that locked me away from my progress I was less than a person More than a caged parrot their actions pricked me like pins their limits made me powerless little did they know all this…

#TRENDSETTERS

I always thought Parisians were the most trendy people on earth. All I envisioned them doing was worrying  most about the spring or fall collection being in their closet by big brands and designs.Maybe on bad days or breakups they would munch on macaroons and totally get over every single problem.After all people who look…

Uncomfortable inside blanket

I Keep thanking my excuses For The things I didn’t want to do Regret Keeps reminding me that I could have been You.

Back and forth

Some of us Have more past than future Noone knows If that’s fortunate Or less.

What you do when you judge

I always like to write about being non-judgemental but sometimes I cant be what I write. A friend of mine asked me today what I meant when I wrote that judging is the worst thing a human being could do to another human being. Well I am writing this for you so that now you…

bullets

I aim my smile at you I miss it every time…. you look away not knowing you have missed a bullet you aim your eyes at no one in particular I wish it was me all the time you stand there unaware that your eyes are guns

Chapter 17 :Intelligence,Individuality and India

A lot of us are told to measure ourselves based on how other people measure us. But we are never told that human beings are not here to be measured or else we would just have been numbers instead of names and we could have been maths instead of memories.We are also told not to…

Life

Dear Life I am not supposed to live you anymore I am supposed to understand and get by I am supposed to treasure a ring instead of acceptance and love I am supposed to fear society instead of being a part of it I should probably just grow up and give my best to someone…

QUESTION MARKS

As a curious little girl,I was told to not as “too many” questions because “decent women are not bold What if I’d become a question mark instead of being a cautious,delicate woman? Men are majestic and entitled to remark while opinions make women less human but then again…. which woman knows what being treated as…

The Process

I will buy a piece of land Build a concrete box over it Look for my freedom there and call it ‘mine’ I will exchange my dreams For fake appreciation and a lot of dime I will refuse to believe in stars let everyone know that it’s just expensive stones that shine I will put…

Chapter 16 :Game of thrones..Anderson Cooper and Earth Day

I am 22 years old and I do not care at all about the fact that Anderson Cooper is gay…..his choices does not make him any less charming…he is still fine as fuck and watching him just makes my day.Gay,Lesbian,Straight or whatever…a human being is a human being…and there is nothing in the world…no amount…

flawless

Of course you are flawless No doubt about that Because You are not human to begin with

Why I never want a husband like Ram

If you are wondering who Ram is you are not Hindu….Ram is the  man of Hindus he is THE MAN Noone can be manlier than Ram ever!!! Like what hasn’t Ram done ?? Ram picked up the Shiva dhanus like it was a toothpick ,he went into the wild for fourteen years and survived because…

why dont you deal with it?

she ties infinity in her head like hair strands with a rubber band that almost puts things to place she knows they only know what you reveal yet does not care showing all she knows  does not even bother becoming friends with ”them” because friends make the worst enemies she remembers you and all that…

Chapter 15

This is the time I think I am not capable of any human relationship.I am not meant for nothing….because I am nothing. Things get screwed up easily,and there is no hope of getting better….things just get worse…and just when I think it could not get any worse than that….someone surprises me out of the blue…and…

Gender

You tell me not to spread my legs if I do  end up being  something wrong I don’t even ‘do’ something wrong I am ”wrong” but if I dont How will I cover  distances? How will universe start? How will you know how art feels like when it pumps your blood? How will you ever…

chapter 12

I miss my freinds.I miss myself when I was with them.I miss being stupid and positive….I miss smiling and everything in between.I used to laugh with my roommate till my stomach hurt every single day…and here smiling is  a pain in the ass. I cant even curse…cos that is not what decent girls do…decent girls…

slow typing in a dark room

I wish the darkness inspired me to be the moon or even a firefly would be more than fine but I am surrounded by so much of it that I don’t remember what it is and what is mine I wish I was a poem born from pain or even a paragraph about how it…

distances

Whatever you say is ”fairly valid” whatever I feel is not Whatever I have I need to ”let go” and whatever you say … comes with a full stop.

Reasons

When it started…there was no need for it everything that happened came naturally…without explanations or reasons or anything valid We did not start for anything.. we just started…just like that….knowing when we would return Now we are at that point where everything we do needs a reason to take the next big step you need…

CHAPTER 7

It takes less than Rs 20 for me to cover the distance that transforms me from Tukku to Digital Marketing Manager whose designation is a communications assistant  because a fresh graduate is not supposed to be in a senior post. In that journey of around 20 mins,on days I forget my earphones home I listen…

CHAPTER 3

The reason I write is because it is my religion…this is how I pray…this is how my prayers are answered….this is how God exists for me and this is how I find my calm…this is how I heal myself. It has been working to some extent because I am this ball of expression and I…

CHAPTER 2 :

Aastha Tamang Maskey’s songs have been saving me for the past few days and  she is not even aware of  how she is changing my life🙂 That is the best part of being an artist and expressing yourself truly you know….you never know what you do might change who how….that is beautiful ….its extraordinary and…

CHAPTER 1

I am 22 years old and I am having a major quarter life crisis.I am not ashamed to admit this and by no way does this mean I am losing the game.I have not given up on life.I am not a grey dustball that needs to be thrown into the garbage bin….I am just lost…..and…

what it was

You were not my escape You were not my excuse You were my reason but it does not matter anymore

What being a friend taught me.

  Being your friend is one of the best form of ‘being’ in my life. You have accepted me without terms and conditions and that has been beautiful.We have laughed and cried and danced and watched frozen (you watched it just because I was too excited).We even watched Gatsby and the other stupid movie that…

shadows

Stop being so transparent please you cannot live this life being so invisible .

1st JUNE 2016

FUCK its 2016. its june 2016. I don’t even know why it is 2016 already I am not even done laughing at the Mayan Calendar joke damn it. The visions that I had for myself are not even on the to do list anymore.I went from being a grateful person to a groggy asshole in…

May 31 2016

It has been long since I wrote to you.It has been long since I wrote about you. This does not mean you were not thought of.You were loved ever since you took me for the ride to Pattaya and gave me this super thick BATMAN comic.I was never paid attention to that way you know.You…

May 30th 2016: STEP OUTSIDE

You are constantly told to stop overthinking.They forget that is what makes you a being. Breathing is synonymous to thinking for you and you do not understand how it is not so for most people.It is okay do not put on your judgmental glasses for them.Let them be.Just like how you would like to be…

May 29th 2016

You have always been someone who feels a lot of unexplainable things and never had you ever felt guilty about that. Since when did you start feeling guilty for being alive? Since when did what other people said of you become more important than what you thought of your life? Humans have never had it…

10 lessons I learnt by taking myself too seriously

1.The reason my shoulders hurt is not because I have a lot of responsibilities but because I slouch while I sit.I need to be careful of my posture and probably do some yoga . 2.Let’s be real here I am just 23 and I have not yet figured out how to ride my scooter without…

Chapter 24 :Forgiveness,Fathers and Freedom

The year 2015 was a very interesting year for me,I would say that is the year I began my adulthood.I started paying my taxes for the first time and well that is adulthood. Drastic emotional and mental changes,changes in behavior and everything,not being able to accept how lost I am and also inability to think…